How to Build Habits That Stick (Even When Life Feels Chaotic)
Estimated Reading Time: 5 minutes
Because your growth shouldn’t depend on perfect conditions.
We’ve all been there, we start something with the best intentions, a spark of motivation, maybe even a shiny new planner… and then life happens.
Work deadlines. Family responsibilities. Emotional curveballs.
Suddenly, that habit you were so committed to feels like a distant memory.
Here’s the truth most productivity advice won’t tell you:
The problem isn’t you. The problem is building habits in a way that relies on willpower alone.
And willpower is the first thing to disappear when life feels overwhelming.
The good news?
You can create habits that stick, even in the middle of chaos, if you shift the way you approach them.
Let’s walk through how.
1. Start Smaller Than You Think
Most people set habits that are too big to maintain consistently.
The key is to shrink your habit down to something so easy, it feels almost silly to skip.
Instead of:
Meditating for 20 minutes daily → Start with 2 minutes
Doing a 60-minute workout → Start with 5 squats while your coffee brews
Journaling pages of reflections → Start with one sentence about how you feel
Small actions done consistently build trust with yourself, and trust is what creates habits that last.
2. Attach It to Something You Already Do
New habits are more likely to stick when you connect them to existing routines.
Examples:
Stretch while your tea steeps
Say three things you’re grateful for while brushing your teeth
Put on calming music as soon as you log off work
This is called habit stacking, and it uses your brain’s love of patterns to your advantage.
3. Focus on the Feeling, Not Just the Task
When life feels chaotic, it’s easy to lose sight of why we started a habit.
Ask yourself: What is the feeling this habit gives me?
If your habit is morning movement, maybe the deeper why is:
Feeling more energized
Shaking off stress
Feeling connected to your body
When you focus on the feeling rather than the perfect execution, you’ll find more ways to achieve it, even if the “how” changes day to day.
4. Remove as Much Friction as Possible
Chaos eats away at your mental energy. Make your habit so easy to start that you don’t have to negotiate with yourself.
Examples:
Lay out your workout clothes the night before
Keep your journal and pen on your pillow so you see it before bed
Pre-fill your water bottle in the evening so it’s ready in the morning
The less resistance you feel at the start, the more likely you are to follow through.
5. Make It Flexible, Not Fragile
If your habit only works under perfect conditions, it won’t survive real life.
Instead:
Give yourself a “minimum version” of your habit for chaotic days
Allow it to adapt to your environment (e.g., meditating in the car before a meeting)
Focus on consistency over perfection
Progress is still progress, even if it’s smaller than you planned.
6. Anchor It in Your Identity
Long-term habits come from who you believe you are, not just what you do.
Instead of saying:
“I’m trying to exercise.”
Say:
“I’m someone who moves my body every day.”
Your brain loves consistency between your identity and your actions. When you claim your identity first, the actions naturally follow.
7. Celebrate the Small Wins
In chaotic seasons, it’s tempting to only notice what you didn’t do.
Instead, celebrate the fact that you:
Showed up for 2 minutes of meditation
Took a deep breath instead of reacting instantly
Made one nourishing choice today
These micro-celebrations keep your brain motivated and reinforce the habit loop.
8. You Don’t Need a Perfect Life to Create a Better One
If there’s one thing I want you to take from this, it’s this:
Consistency isn’t about control, it’s about care.
You can start building the habits you want now, even if your life feels far from settled. And you can do it in a way that honors your nervous system, your energy, and your humanity.
If you’d like support in creating habits that feel natural, not forced, and align with the life you truly want, that’s exactly what we do inside our free discovery calls.
Together, we’ll explore what’s been keeping you stuck, clear the deeper emotional patterns, and create a path that works in your real life.
