By June, RYS Practitioner
Maybe you've thought of her lately. The friend you once told everything to, and now only see in old photos.
Nothing went wrong. Life just moved, and one day you noticed the space where she used to be.
You may have heard the saying that people come into your life for a season, a reason, or a lifetime. I've been sitting with that idea, and with all the people who have walked beside me over my sixty-some years. Here I'll share a few of their stories, what they've taught me about letting friendships be what they are, and four gentle questions you can ask about your own.
1. When friendships fade without a falling out
There are people we meet and simply connect with. We laugh, we share, we support each other, and for a time our lives naturally intertwine.
Then, somehow, life changes. We take different paths. Our circumstances shift. Before we know it, we've gone our separate ways.
There doesn't have to be a falling out or a particular reason. Sometimes we grow in different directions, and it happens so quietly that we don't notice until we look back.
I've had many friendships like that. If you have too, you haven't done anything wrong. It may simply be how a full life moves.
2. The friends who stay for a lifetime
One very special friend came into my life when I was about six years old.
We are very different people and we live many miles apart. Yet whenever we get together, it is as though no time has passed. Our families have stayed connected through the years, and the bond has never gone away. I treasure that friendship deeply.
Then there are the people who arrive completely unexpectedly. Charlotte is one of those for me. (In the above photo. x)
Our paths crossed because our children were connected, and there was an immediate ease between us. We just clicked. Over the years life took our families in different directions, but somehow our friendship remained.
What could have been a connection for one chapter became something much more meaningful. I'm so grateful that life brought her into mine.
3. Friends for a season, and what they leave behind
Then there were the friends from school, and the people I met when I started working.
I remember one friend in particular who brought out a very playful side of me. We laughed, did silly things, and had adventures that weren't my usual way of being.
Looking back, I smile at those memories. She gave me permission to be a different version of myself for a while.
There were also the people who were simply good people. The ones who showed up, who you could count on, who made giving and receiving friendship feel natural. There was never any keeping score. You were there for them, they were there for you, and that was enough.
Here is what I've come to believe. We don't always get to choose how long someone will walk beside us.
Someone can be in our lives for a short time and still leave something that stays with us forever.
Maybe we aren't meant to hold on to every person who touches our lives. Maybe we're meant to appreciate the chapter we shared, carry the memories with us, and trust that our paths unfolded as they needed to.
Even the friendships that didn't last mattered. Each person brought something into my life that I needed at that time.
4. Earth angels: the people who show up when we need them
And then there is Erica.
I met her many years ago, the very first time I went to meet the family who would become my in-laws. She and her husband were there that evening, and I felt an immediate connection with her that I couldn't quite explain.
Through my marriage, working in the family business, raising my children, speaking up for them at school, and all of life's challenges, she was always there. My cheerleader. My supporter. Someone I could always turn to.
She is now in her eighties and I'm in my sixties, yet our connection has never been about age or circumstance.
We call each other earth angels. It's our name for a person who seems to be placed in your life to love you through it. She says I'm hers, and I know in my heart that she is mine.
Something about our connection feels deeper than I can put into words. Perhaps we are mirrors for one another. Perhaps it's a karmic connection, a bond that feels older than this one lifetime. Or perhaps some souls just recognize each other when they meet.
Whatever it is, I'm incredibly grateful for it.
5. Four reflection questions about the people who shaped you
If you'd like to try this yourself, find ten quiet minutes, a cup of something warm, and a journal if you like to write.
Who came into your life at just the right time? Picture where you were then, and what they brought with them.
Who brought out a side of you that you might not have discovered otherwise? Notice whether that side of you is still around.
Who was there for you when you needed them most? Let yourself feel the support, even now.
Who still brings a smile to your face, even though your paths have separated? Stay with the smile for a moment.
There are no right answers. If sadness comes up alongside the gratitude, that's welcome too. Both can sit at the same table.
And if someone comes to mind who is still within reach, you might send a short note. Something as simple as "I was thinking of you today."
Coming home to yourself, through the people who walked beside you
At Reignite Your Soul, we talk a lot about coming home to yourself. I think looking back at our friendships is one quiet way to do that.
Every person who walked beside you shows you something of who you were, and who you are now. The playful one. The loyal one. The one who knew how to receive.
Maybe some people aren't lost from our lives at all. Maybe they became part of our story. And what a beautiful story it is.
If this stirred something and you'd like company as you sit with it, you're welcome to book a free Discovery Call with us. No pressure, just a conversation.
June Plahuta, Weekly Spark Author
About the author
June Plahuta is a practitioner at Reignite Your Soul and one of the three voices behind The Weekly Spark. Now in her sixties, a grandmother, mother, friend, practitioner and space holder, she writes from her personal experiences and lessons learned along the way. She believes: “Life doesn’t have to be perfect to be beautiful.”
